Round 1

Welcome back to the Division 3 report. This is the 1st season where there has been promotions into Div 3 so it will be interesting to see how the both Aussie ManU and Besiktas go this season, good luck to everyone.... except when you all play Spartak of course. Division 3 again looks like a lottery however you have to say that the two teams relegated from Div 2 have very strong lineups and should be there at the end.

Hopefully I will get fully into this again and go with game photos etc. Just at the moment though I can't be arsed. A big thank you to Jesus Hernandez for the pre season wrap which I totally forgot about (even if he did predict Spartak would come 5-8th!:^))

Nitro FC 4 - 1 Eastern FC
P_Vendelboe (nit) 7' pen
P_Vendelboe (nit) 27' pen
P_Vendelboe (nit) 67'
R_Cheng (eas) 76'
P_Vendelboe (nit) 81'

Well the battle of last seasons Div 2 rejects continues and produces the highest scoring game of the round, 5 goals in 70 odd minutes with Nitros Vendelboe looking like he wants to become this seasons Leonardo. It was all over as a game pretty much after the 67th minute when Vendelboe got his hatrick, Cheng (the Eastern midfield colossus) tried to spark an Eastern revival but since he waited until the 76th minute he probably left it a bit late. When Vendelboe banged in his 4th of the game a couple of minutes later the Nitro fans were going berserk screaming at the opposition "We're going back up again losers!". Igor Oks the Nitro manager apparently looked over to the Eastern bench and waved a cheery hello at Frank Chiu, who wasn't particularly amused.

It was murder on the pitch and things didn't get that much better for Franks boys as the Shaft Monkey™ made a brief appearance to give Olsensen a minor butt tweak, he also stopped by the cheery Nitro dressing room to give the Nitro defender Blanco a bit of a workover as well, A shaken Blanco swears the Shaft Monkey™ whispered in his ear after having its way with him "Don't forget… I just love winners!". In other matters Frank will be happier with his goal keeper Phillips improving his skill, although looking at the scoreline I don't know how much he actually touched the ball during the game.

Spartak Haifa 1 - 1 Apijarevoleada APR
J_Hopoate (hai) 18'
J_Agpensa (api) 85'

This was one of those games that could have gone either way plenty of scoring opportunities for both teams but good goalkeeping and piss poor finishing saw it end a low scoring affair. Hopoate got the scoring underway in the 18th minute and it looked like Spartak had done enough to get the win until the 85th minute where Agpensa managed to pull a vital goal back and made sure that the Alphabet boys took something home. The Spartak manager was furious with his team for letting in the last gasp Api goal and when the said goal went in he totally wigged out, frothing at the mouth screaming at his players (something about you stupid truckers I think it was). This behaviour soon deteriorated and Jesus Hernandez the Api manager was looking a wee bit concerned for the safety of his own players after that because Lidstone literally would snap at them like a rabid dog and have to be restrained physically whenever they went by on the field. When the referee blew full time to the amazement of everyone around him Lidstone calmly wiped his face clean of froth and walked off. When asked about the episode after the match he said "They were getting on top of us… I had to do something to distract them."

Saskatoon Wanderers 1 - 0 Barnsley Tykes
B_Bong (sas) 35'

This was a battle between a Div 2 has been (Barnsley) and a Div 2 should have been (Saskatoon) and with the quality of the players availiable to both teams you would have expected a quailty game. Well it may have been quality but there was very little scoring evident and Bongs 35th minute effort was enough to seal the game for Saskatoon and allow them to start the season with a win. Barnsley seem to have a wee problem with discipline as they have a total of 5 players already in the top 20 Thug list. They have played 2 games already however so they have had a bit of a start on the rest of the field, but it could become a real problem for them.

Not much in the off field section this week with the only item of interest being the return of the Saskatoon defender Arabic which will improve their already impressive defence.

Houston Odyssey 1 - 0 Besiktas
P_Joaoe (hou) 26' pen

This is the first game for Besiktas in Div 3 this season and Manager Cagri Saglik (we have both Cagris in Div 3 now) will be a little disappointed with his teams 1st result. However he would be pleased that the only way Houston managed to score was from the spot Both teams are fairly well matched for personnel however Houston have the services of the ageing maestro Grobbelaar who probably will tip the scale in the direction of Houston in tight games. Iggy will be please to get his season off the ground with a win, after the massive sex scandals surrounding this manager it would have been understandable if Houston had a slow start. This seems not to be the case though.

In other news Besiktas had a mixed weekend… A correct SL increase for the defender Halilagic and getting Sagito back from injury will be pleasing for the new Div 3 manager, less thrilling for him will be the injury of both Khlestov and Barmbell for 3 and 1 week respectivly.

Pasmaters 3 - 0 Aussie Man Utd
Roy (pas) 2'
Roy (pas) 6'
Roy (pas) 30'

The second promotee from Div 4 also didn't have an auspicious start. Cagris Pasmaters finished the game in the 30th minute after a hatrick by Roy. Ian must have been tearing his hair out in the 1st half as the Pasmaters attack just waltzed through some pretty flimsy AMU defence. The sounds of physical violence was heard from the AMU changing room at half time and they came out a new (if slightly bruised and battered) team…. Well they didn't actually get on the scoresheet however they did stop the goal haemorrhage that they were suffering in the 1st half. Cagri will be stoked as Pasmaters had a shit last season and so will be looking to improve immensely.

Well we now know why the Shaft Monkey™ was so brief in his attentions to the Eastern players, he was saving his energy for Roy. How the hell does the hatrick hero get a tackling increase except on purpose I have a suspicion that Roy is a bighole hero today and will be coming out of the closet some time later this week. Bollokov got a passing tweak from SM™ but since he was mainly attending to Roy he got off lightly.

Pl   Team                   P    W   D   L    GF   GA   GD   Pts
1    Nitro_FC              1    1   0   0     4    1    3     3
2    Pasmaters             1    1   0   0     3    0    3     3
3    Saskatoon_Wanderers   1    1   0   0     1    0    1     3
4    Houston_Odyssey       1    1   0   0     1    0    1     3
5    Spartak_Haifa         1    0   1   0     1    1    0     1
6    Apijarevoleada_APR    1    0   1   0     1    1    0     1
7    Barnsley_Tykes        1    0   0   1     0    1   -1     0
8    Besiktas              1    0   0   1     0    1   -1     0
9    Eastern_FC            1    0   0   1     1    4   -3     0
10   Aussie_Man_Utd        1    0   0   1     0    3   -3     0

Pos  Name                         Gm      Gls
1    P_Vendelboe (nit)             1        4
2    Roy (pas)                     2        4
3    B_Bong (sas)                  2        3
4    D_Webber (amu)                1        2
5    E_Shivute (bar)               2        2
6    P_Joaoe (hou)                 2        2
7    J_Agpensa (api)               1        1
8    J_Hopoate (hai)               1        1
9    R_Elmoor (bar)                1        1
10   E_Yorke (amu)                 1        1

Pos  Name                         Gm      Ass
1    K_Diehard (pas)               2        2
2    Apijinho (api)                1        1
3    R_Elmoor (bar)                1        1
4    D_Cameron (bar)               1        1
5    N_Silvestre (amu)             1        1
6    E_Beckham (amu)               1        1
7    Q_Scholes (amu)               1        1
8    O_Olsensen (eas)              1        1
9    J_Doe (nit)                   1        1
10   B_O'Connell (nit)             1        1

Pos  Name                         Gm       Dp
1    C_Jensen (pas)                1       10
2    Mehmet (bes)                  2        8
3    T_McShafty (hai)              1        4
4    H_Foxe (bar)                  1        4
5    R_Alvarez (hou)               1        4
6    E_Erwin (amu)                 1        4
7    S_Giggs (amu)                 1        4
8    K_Yau (eas)                   1        4
9    S_Lambert (bar)               2        4
10   T_Samoscanec (bar)            2        4

Pos  Name                         Gm    P.Pts
1    Q_Delpi (pas)                 2       65
2    P_Vendelboe (nit)             1       56
3    G_Brumer (pas)                2       42
4    Roy (pas)                     2       41
5    R_Elmoor (bar)                1       35
6    K_Diehard (pas)               2       32
7    D_Webber (amu)                1       31
8    K_Stam (amu)                  1       30
9    B_Bong (sas)                  2       30
10   O_Olsensen (eas)              1       29